Much later...

Snape: "HARRY! Let's go back inside your mind! Dumbledore wants me to!"

Harry: "You ALWAYS want to go in my head!  Do you find me attractive or something?"

Harry: "HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT?! I am NOT in love with you!  Quite the opposite!  Now, let's go into your BRAIN, boy!"

Harry: "Whatever.  Pervert."

*insert Harry's memory*

note: Man, Lily Potter's hair sure is like a mustache on her face!  Ever heard of HAIR SPRAY?  It works wonders!

Harry: "Okay, so we went into my head.  And you seemed to REALLY like my daydream...  Now let's go into yours!  Super!Harry powers, commence!"

*insert Snape's hopeful daydream*

OMG he is wanting to be part of Harry's family!!  But two fathers and a mother for Harry?  That's a bit much... Um... is that even legal?  o_0

Snape: ".... OH MY GOD DON'T TELL ANYONE OF MY SICK DESIRE TO HAVE BOTH A HUSBAND AND A WIFE!"

Harry:  "Ewww.  I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.  I thought you loving my first memory was a bit weird, but thinking up ones for yourself?  With YOU in it?  Gross!"

Harry, feeling disgusted, decides to take a walk out on the grounds.  Somehow, it turned sunny outside.

Boy: "Hey, if you look up in the sky, you can see a cloud shaped like a bunny!  How cute!"

Harry: "You're retarded."

Boy: "And that one looks like Voldemort!  See, it's bald, evil looking, depressed, and has the ways of old fame given upon it that is no more.  Or maybe it's Britney Spears..."

Harry: "Uh... no.... look closer..."

Boy: "WILL SOMEONE PLEASE GET ME DOWN FROM HERE?!"

Harry: "You all are weird.  I'm going back inside now."

When Harry gets inside, he is immediately attacked.

Snape: "I HATE YOU!"

Harry: "WHAT THE HECK?! I was just going for a mid-afternoon stroll, even though apparently it's back to being the middle of the night.  And remember, I know about you and your love of my mom... and dad!"

Snape: "... crap.  Well, just go then."

Harry: "K."

Meanwhile...

Umbridge: "Oh, my.  There is a bit of light on my face.  Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight!  Wish I may, wish I might!"

Ron: "What the heck is wrong with Umbridge?"

Harry: "I'm so surprised that I actually remember your name, Ron.  Not.  haha."

Ron: "Puh-lease.  You just said it."

Harry: "My face is being cut off, Ginger-Kid."

Ron: "I AM NOT A GINGER KID!"

Umbridge: "Oh where, oh where did my pretty light go?  Oh where, oh where can it beeeeee?"

*insert funny Umbridge falling scene*

I usually don't actually laugh during movies, but.... LOL.  Look at her little arms!

*insert evil dragon thing*

Dragon: "RAWRRRR!"

Umbridge: "ZOMG I AM ON FIRE!!!!!!  And it is HOT HOT HOT!!"

This isn't actually that cool looking.  It's more how I would picture dog slobber to look if it could float.  Or something.  I mean, it looks like SPIT for heaven's sake!  Flying spit!  Gross!

Umbridge: *head falls off*

Eww.

Soon, we see a magical W in the sky.  But what does the W stand for?

Luna: "I know this.  This is the symbol W for "Whore", as in there is a whore among us.  Now, where's Ginny?"

Everyone: "LOL GINNY'S THE W WORD! HAHAHHA!"

Boy up front: "HAHAH!!! And look, U for.... umm... well, it's the only letter I can make with my arms! HAHAHA WHEEEE!"

Harry: "Man, I feel sick..."

Harry: "I'm going to barf!!"

Hermione: "Harry?  Are you fainting again?  I thought we had been through this all in our third year... you know... when you fainted about 6 times? Didn't we talk about how badly this damages your image?"

Harry: "Look, I need to go to the Hospital wing.  I haven't been there in ages, and I want to.  Okay?  I don't want everyone finding out about this, either."

Hermione: "Er... no kidding. It's embarrassing.  Look, let's just talk this over.  Your fainting isn't *that* bad... in fact... um... I can help you overcome this weird obsession... in fact, let's just sneak off somewhere and make out or something... okay?"

Ron: "WHAT?!"

Hermione: "God, get a girlfriend.  Talk about embarrassing!  You are always following us around, it's creepy."

Hermione: "See, isn't this more romantic?  Just the two of us, and a lovely fire-place.  Isn't this nice?"

Harry: "I love you."

Umbridge: "WHY ARE YOU TWO HERE IN MY OFFICE?!  Why is Harry's shirt off??"

Harry: "I rather not make out with my girlfriend in front of everyone..."

Umbridge: "YOU TWO ARE NOT TO MAKE OUT HERE!!! You-Know-Who still has plans to separate you two in order to finally have a chance to rule the world!  Why can't you just break up already?  Why can't you listen to R/Hr shippers?!!"

Harry: "Hey, listen Ron/Hermione and Ginny/Harry fans... you all are RETARDED!  And hey, Umbridge, I thought your head had come off...?"

Umbridge: "I HAVE MANY HEADS!!!!  And I have captured Hermione, and now we will go to the Forest and look at centaurs!"

Harry: "Whatever."

Hermione: "Well, this isn't as romantic as I had planned, but it can do..."

Harry: *looks at Hermione's rear*

Umbridge: *conducts song* "Following the leader, the leader, the leader!  Following the leader!"

Umbridge: "WHY AREN'T YOU TWO SINGING?!?!!?  Haven't you learned ANYTHING this year?!"

Harry: "Well, we haveee learned that if the camera focuses on only two of us, then it means that something bad will happen to the person out of the camera shot.  Like, you are standing by yourself, which means at any moment a giant will pick you up and eat you."

Umbridge: "NUH UH!"

Harry: "Any second now!"

Umbridge: "LET ME DOWN, FREAK!"

Giant: "This is unpleasant for both of us, actually.  I dislike the color pink, and you are positively reeking from it."

Harry: "HAHAHA the Giant threw her in a tree! LOL TEE-HEE-HEE ROFL!"

Hermione: "Squirrels are attacking her...."

Harry: "Eh, no, they stopped.  They don't like the color pink, either."

Harry: "And alright, Hermione, let's go make out now."

Hermione: "Huh?  Oh, right.  Sure.  But look at all of the squirrels!!"

As Harry and Hermione run back to the castle to finally get some alone time...

They run into this group!

Neville: "Let's have a tea party, Harry!"

Hermione: "WHAT?! I thought you FINALLY wanted some alone time!"

Harry: "I do!  You guys can't come with us!  We don't want to have a tea party!"

Luna: "Well, I have a good way to getting to a private place.  It's so private, you have to fly ugly horses to get there!"

Harry: "WHATEVER. I HATE YOU ALL."

Soon:

Harry: "HERMIONE, MY LOVE!  I will soon be with you!"

Hermione: "WE SHOULD HAVE RIDDEN THE SAME HORSE!"

Harry: "Oh, yeah.  Whoops."

Harry: "LET'S GO TO OUR ROOM!!"

Hermione: "I'm running as fast as I can!  Notice the motion blur lines?"

Ron: "WHY AM I WITH YOU?!  AGAIN?!"

However, once they got there... they found a room full of glowy things and that crazy woman who doesn't shave!

Bellatrix: "I WILL EAT YOU."

Malfoy: "Oh, I see you have discovered me and a woman who is NOT my wife.  Well, I would be happy if you didn't tell her.... I don't want this prostitute to ruin my marriage, you know..."

Bellatrix/prostitute: *hisses like an angry cat*

Harry: "Oh, I am telling.  I am telling your wife AND your son!  MWAHAHAHHAH!"

Hermione: "YOU ARE A BAD MAN, MALFOY!  Prostitutes have sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), you know! I hope you were protected!"

Malfoy: "Er... STDs?  Does she look like the woman who would give me STDs?"

Let's zoom in on that picture.

Yeah.

Okay.

Gross.  STD alert!!