Harry:  "Hermione!  Where did you go?!  I was so busy checking out your butt that when a person passed by us I lost where you were!"

Hermione:  "HARRYY!!!!!  If you weren't so hot, I would punch you for being so stupid.  HOW DARE YOU GET LOST!"

Harry:  "Hermione!  Where did you gooooooo?!"

Hermione:  "You idiot, I'm right here!  But look- I'm the one who is trying to save you, not Ginny.  And if I never see you again, I must tell you that I really want to snog you!"

Harry:  "Hey!  You're right!  Where IS Ginny?!"

*Unconscious from being kicked in the head*  Who the heck would kick him?!?!!?  Don't tell me it was an "accident."  It was sabotage!   

Harry dreams about Hermione.  If only he could have snogged her.  Don't worry Harry, the time will come.

Oooh!  Supa!hottie is back!  Wonder what he is up to?

Oh, just the Dark Mark.  Nothing major.  Carry on.

Awwww.  Look how happy it makes him!  Almost a crazy, zany kind of happy, but... well... erm...Let him have his fun.

Hermione:  "Quick, let's snog before Ron gets here!"

Harry:  "Darn!  Too late."

Hermione:  "Why does this keep happening?!"

Ron:  "I'm still here, you know.  Maybe I'll just pull a funny face, and hope for a scrap of attention."

Whoa!  What the heck?  Suddenly we flash to this old lady who has a spider on her collar??!  She's scarier than the Dark Mark!!

Old lady:  "Something from the trolley?"  *evil cackle*

Here we are yet again reinforced about how poor the Weasleys are.  Yeah, yeah, yeah, we get the point already.

Cho:  "Hey, Harry.  I just happen to be here, you know.  I wasn't stalking you... Erm... Well, anyhow, I was put into the plot to make the characters more "diverse".  Oh, and to steal Hermione's future boyfriend.  You know, the usual.  What about you?"

Harry:  ... "Um... same."

Hermione:  "What was that all about?  A pretty girl didn't just threaten to take you away from me, did she?"

Harry:  "Uhh... no?"

Crookshanks:  *thinks*  I haven't been brushed in months!

Ron:  "Does anyone ever wonder why I wear the letter 'R' on my sweater?  Is it because my mum thinks I'm so stupid that I can't even remember who I am?  Gosh, no wonder I'm suicidal."   

Hermione *ignores Ron*:  "Harry, I have a funny feeling about this year.  My senses are magically telling me that you will be entered, without your knowledge, in a dangerous tournament that has been known to kill people in the past."

Harry:  "O rly?  Bring it on!"

Harry attempts to look up Hermione's skirt upon exiting the train, but she is wearing pants instead.  Smart girl.  Harry is SUCH a perve!!

Here Hagrid nearly gets killed by a carriage.  Not a dragon, not a giant basilisk, not even one of Snape's stares, but a carriage. Not exactly the best way to start off the year.

Hermione:  !!  "Wow, did Hagrid just die?"

Harry:  "Sadly, no, I think he just passed out."

Weasley twin:  "Look how big I can open my mouth!  Beat THAT, Hermione!"

Hermione:  "Great, he's not dead."

Harry:  *sarcastically*  "Oooh!  Joy.  Another year of horrible teaching from him."

Ginny:  "Brilliant!  I get to have Hagrid as a professor this year!  This is going to be, like, so much fun!"